{"id":6522,"date":"2016-02-21T15:25:00","date_gmt":"2016-02-21T14:25:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/bibliotheek\/looking-askance\/"},"modified":"2026-09-15T17:06:33","modified_gmt":"2026-09-15T15:06:33","slug":"looking-askance","status":"publish","type":"library_pt","link":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/library\/kolommen\/looking-askance\/","title":{"rendered":"Looking askance"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-post-date\"><time datetime=\"2016-02-21T15:25:00+01:00\">21 February 2016<\/time><\/div>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I look at the world askew. It feels as though the right side of my field of vision has developed a blind spot of enormous proportions. Every few moments, I squint my good eye shut, only to confirm once again that I can see virtually nothing through my affected eye.  <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">My tears stem from a sense of helplessness.<\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I&#8217;ve lost my grip.<\/p>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Daily Life<\/h2>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I cling to whatever gives me a sense of security. For me, that\u2019s my work. The routine of ordinary, everyday life keeps me going. No matter how hard it is, I\u2019m back at work just three days after the shock.   <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The normal rhythm of my life gives me a sense of stability. I bike to work. When I\u2019m almost there, I have to bike up the embankment of a high bridge over the Amsterdam-Rhine Canal. This climb, twice a day, symbolizes my struggle. Cycling isn\u2019t easy, but once I reach the top, I\u2019ve made it through yet again.    <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I vow never to get off this bridge. \u201cThis bridge won\u2019t bring me down.\u201d <\/p>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Storm<\/h2>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A week after the heart attack, a storm is raging. Battling against the fierce gale, I struggle up the bridge. I notice someone taking pictures of me and the other cyclists as we make our way up.  <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Later that day, a coworker notices that I&#8217;m on the front page of Nu.nl. For one day, I&#8217;m world-famous in the Netherlands. <\/p>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Seeing Things Differently<\/h2>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I\u2019m almost constantly aware of how my view of the world has changed. It wears me out. Already in the first week, I make a conscious decision to accept this. I don\u2019t torment myself with \u201cWhy me?\u201d   <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Seeing things differently requires a different perspective.<\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I&#8217;m going to learn that, no matter what.<\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This column also appeared on<a href=\"https:\/\/runningrita.nl\/column-blindiaan\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"> Rita<\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/runningrita.nl\/column-blindiaan\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">&#8216;s<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/runningrita.nl\/column-blindiaan\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">website <\/a>, also known as Blindiaan.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Within a day of the shock, I know that my vision in one eye has been impaired by a blocked blood vessel. Other than that, I know nothing. I\u2019m scared and incredibly tired. I\u2019ve never felt as exhausted as I did during those first few days, seeing with only one eye and relying on the other to guide me.   <\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":6523,"template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_daextauttol_enable_tooltips":""},"library_cat":[112],"class_list":["post-6522","library_pt","type-library_pt","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","library_cat-kolommen"],"acf":[],"permalink_manager":null,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/library_pt\/6522","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/library_pt"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/library_pt"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6523"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6522"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"library_cat","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/library_cat?post=6522"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}