{"id":6187,"date":"2026-07-13T17:13:49","date_gmt":"2026-07-13T15:13:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/bibliotheek\/recognizing-and-ignoring-fear\/"},"modified":"2026-09-09T17:07:44","modified_gmt":"2026-09-09T15:07:44","slug":"recognizing-and-ignoring-fear","status":"publish","type":"library_pt","link":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/library\/kolommen\/recognizing-and-ignoring-fear\/","title":{"rendered":"Recognizing (and Ignoring) Fear"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-post-date\"><time datetime=\"2026-07-13T15:10:21.411Z\">13 July 2026<\/time><\/div>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That last sentence keeps popping into my head more and more often\u2014right after I\u2019ve been angry with him, or even in the middle of a happy moment together. <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That sentence hides a lot of fear for me. I\u2019ll be honest: fear has been both a guide and a mental block my whole life. I prefer certainties over risks. I think it over countless times before doing something I\u2019ve never done before. And then, 9 times out of 10, I don\u2019t do it.      <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I don&#8217;t get pricked by the thorns, but I don&#8217;t pick the fruit from the bush either.  <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A while ago, we were asked to make a video as a family about the impact of Milan\u2019s illness. It was published today, and I watched it at my leisure. <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What struck me: Milan talks with great panache about what he\u2019s been through and how it affects him. He doesn\u2019t mention any problems. He does talk about challenges, but in the same breath, he says he actually enjoys them. And he gets a lot out of it, so yeah, that\u2019s great, right?   <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Then there\u2019s me: my story about my son\u2019s resilience is filled with wonder and pride. That immense tension is evident in every word I say. <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Fear should be the last thing to hold him back. He doesn\u2019t deserve that after all that misery. Bring it on, world\u2014I\u2019m ready for you! And yet, sometimes holding back for a moment because you\u2019re unsure gives me, as a father, a certain sense of peace. You\u2019re different, son\u2014act accordingly. Imagine if\u2026.     <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Today we\u2019re at Efteling. Milan didn&#8217;t dare go on a ride, but he did want to. I talked to my wife about it. I said it&#8217;s not up to us to push him. If he doesn&#8217;t want to, he doesn&#8217;t want to. My wife feels completely differently. No, it&#8217;s actually up to us to help him get past that hurdle. Otherwise, it\u2019ll just get harder and harder.       <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She was right. Milan left\u2014and then left again. I was left behind, feeling jealous.    <\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Afterward, I asked Milan how he managed to get over his fear. He said, \u201cDad, the worst thing that could happen is that I\u2019d die, so yeah\u2026\u201d My little Buddha has spoken. He\u2019s certainly not dead. Despite everything. Maybe I\u2019ll go along next time after all.   <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Milan was 2.5 months old when we found out he had eye cancer. A dark period followed, filled with hospital visits, chemotherapy, radiation treatments, and anesthesia. Milan is now 10 years old; he\u2019s missing one eye and has 30% vision in the other. Thank God he\u2019s still with us.   <\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":6189,"template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_daextauttol_enable_tooltips":""},"library_cat":[112],"class_list":["post-6187","library_pt","type-library_pt","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","library_cat-kolommen"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/library_pt\/6187","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/library_pt"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/library_pt"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6189"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6187"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"library_cat","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ver-ooginoog.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/library_cat?post=6187"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}